-Using tumblr more
-Trying to actually be happy and stop pretending
-Become emotionally stable
-Try to stop smoking weed whenever i feel down
-Try to honestly express my feelings
-Stop being so hard on myself
-Embrace what scars i’ve caused my body
-Going to Ontario
-Laugh at myself whenever neseccary
-and so much more.
Some one needs a haircut
the fact that people are very uneducated about the LGBT+ community. sadly because we’re all a part of it, one way or another and we all know a soul who means so much to you in this community. people are just very narrow minded, but what bugs me the most is that when i’m walking down a street people star at me maybe its the way i dress, my hair, piercings, or maybe its that i WEAR A FUCKING ROSARY! yes i’m gay yet religious! i’m not all so, but i have the slightest part of me that is religious and i’m proud i was born in a catholic family. that being said fuck you!
We all have this superficial thought on love; “it only exist in movies, it makes for a good love song, teenagers are only prone to love, love can only come from family.” etc whatever your opinion let it be. Although in everyday life we’re taught that love is an easy feeling, that anyone can meet anybody and that one day love can join the two in some way. That it’s free of flaw, its all a cute love story with a happy ever after, right? All “aww’s and no flaws.”
I want to share my view on love, because to be honest we’ve all felt like we think we know what love is until something happens and BOOM your whole perspective has changed. And maybe so, most likely so mine will change too. But for now I wanna share my view. I’ve been alive for 17 years, young but ever since we’re young we’re taught many thing right, love being one of them. I asked my three younger neighbors. 10 year old Carlos said “it’s the felling you get when you meet the most beautiful, amazing girl and you get married and run away.” 7 year old Jenny said “it’s the feeling my dog gets when I get home from school, or when it watches me get up in the morning.” and 4 year old Chris said “it’s my mom.” To be honest they’re all right but it’s more of combining all three to not make it singled for a certain situation. Think of it this way, its that thing that you can one day hurt but your conscious and mind will hurt about it for every day after you do. Imagine paying 25¢ for a plate at a thrift shop, but it’s so precious to you because it’s just so beautiful and it holds artistic meaning, now imagine one day it slips, and shatters. How would you feel then? It’s the plate that you bought and it held a very deepful meaning to you, now it’s on the floor, shattered and no way to be fixed. It hurts. That’s love. For the older people the ones who have meet there “perfect half” you’re doing every thing right, everything by the book? And mysteriously the other party leaves you and they’re coming up with a million excuses “I need to get my life together I need some time to think, we’re just not working, you’re not putting as much effort as me.” etc. First off there is many things wrong in there for example if you really love someone OR if someone really loves you would they be willing to leave? If they’re perfect in your eyes why would you lift so many flaws? And most importantly if they love you they shouldn’t doubt. Now, same way it goes for each.
I know I’m young, I don’t know what love is between two people whom I’m expected to live my life with romanticly and sexually. I’m totally lost when it comes to that portion of my life, and who knows if we we ever have a moment where it just clicks and we know that we’re in love with a partner in such a way. The one person who’ve made my bones chill to the root, who’s put up with my every inch of flaws, who accepts me for being me, the one who we’ve hurt visa versa, and at the end we cry and beg for an apology and still feel like ultimate crap; is my mom. Never have I felt that in anyone else. Much less anything.